Monday, December 5, 2011

You don't realize before you have children that it is a privileged to go to the store alone. To walk down the isles and look at wrinkle creams without a nosey mini person looking over it asking questions like "Mom! How old are you?!?!" Or "Don't use that... I like that your face looks like Grandma's". But I'm past those days. My youngest child is now 12, and with two teen age daughters at home, i was free to make a quick trip to Target for a prescription refill and to maybe look at some beauty products in peace.

I parked and worked my way into the store. I decided to grab a basket... just in case my leisure shopping got more serious. I was on my way to drop off the prescription first when my cell phone rang and shattered my euphoric moment. A quick glance at caller ID showed it was my 14 year old daughter calling. I was certain she had come up with something that she couldn't live without and would I please pick up while I was there. "Should I answer? Maybe I can pretend the phone didn't get signal in Target." I thought. But my conscience nagged at me, and I was eventually forced by the mother instinct dwelling inside of me to answer the phone.

"Hello?" I said tentatively

"Mom!" the reply came rushing in at me, " Travis stabbed himself with a pencil and he's bleeding and everything!"

"What? Where? How?"

"I don't know how," came the teenage reply, "but he stabbed himself in the armpit"

ARMPIT! Yes you read that correctly. Well, I raced home, and the bleeding has stopped, and no lead broke off in the wound...but it is a nice round puncture wound in his armpit.

I do feel badly for Travis. Not because he somehow (still not adequately explained how) stabbed himself in the armpit. But because someday he'll have a wife/girlfriend/lover of some sort that will ask about the stories behind the scars on his body. His list of scars will include the following:

1. Playing with a bungee cord and somehow through the magic of a giant rubber band with a hook on the end he managed to stab himself in the forehead with the hook. The ER doc super glued it back together, but he's left with a dot scar on his forehead.

2. Bowling he once tripped and instinctively through the bowling ball in the air... he managed to fall to the ground just moments before gravity returned the bowling ball to his hand. This resulted in a broken thumb.

3. And now... he was doing my homework while my mom was at Target... somehow a pencil spontaneously flew into his armpit and stabbed him.

I don't know that any of these qualify as manly accidents that will be considered macho.... but they will certainly bring a laugh to whoever the lucky lady is to hear the tales

1 comment:

  1. That's my grandson, all boy, and I did get a few laughs too!


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